Just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, life squeezes lemon juice in your eye. Blind to what’s ahead, you stumble and fall, hit your knee on the edge of a coffee table, and bump right into life’s next challenge. What the heck just happened? It’s an instant reminder that you maybe didn’t have your suitcase packed and you probably weren’t ready for the trip after all. Don’t worry about it, though. You’re better off walking blindly, stumbling, bumping, and falling. Perfection is for phonies.

Sometimes, people suggest I’m too cryptic. I tell them there’s an easy solution for that…

Everyone is looking for an excuse to not bleed. Not do it, not say it, not write it. It’s easier that way, they think. But is it? Is it really?

People don’t like being vulnerable, but who likes to expose a wound? Worse, having life pour alcohol all over it? Nobody. Find me the person who says, “I do,” and I’ll show you a liar. It’s just not logical. Yet without the alcohol, without the burn, you risk infection. Is that what you want?

Something that courses through your blood, turning everything from red to black…

I love Pepe’s pizza.

The problem isn’t that I love Pepe’s pizza. It’s that I know Pepe’s pizza is possible.

There are two kinds of possibilities: one we can imagine, and one we know is real. The former is something we’ve seen or heard about. The latter is something we’ve had firsthand experience with. I’ll admit, deciphering between the two is more and more difficult with social media, streaming, and the introduction of more imagined possibilities…

Everyone does something for the first time.

The relationship. The business. The creative venture. The single wants to commit. The employee wants to start a business. The attorney wants to be a comedian. Will they succeed or fail? I don’t know. What are the metrics, anyway? Are they your metrics, their metrics, or metrics made up by someone else at some random point in history?

In any case, the best way to guess what someone will do next is…

Last night, it dawned on me.

Cloudy, dazed, and tired, I heard light music playing in the background. It was too faint to peg the song, but with one open eye, I saw a long, naked leg splayed out to the left. I touched it and instantly felt a sensation tickle my nervous system. Shit, that’s my leg.

Heat does that, you know? Makes one leg hang off the bed, dying for air, needing relief. It screams to the rest of your body, “Get me the hell outta here!” It’s that type of warmth that made me realize another body was next to me…

Yesterday, I needed some advice.

This is a predicament we all seem to find ourselves in as we scour our lives for answers. Where should I turn? Who should I go to? These decisions are important, damnit!

Herein lies the problem: people are pretty bad at giving advice. Most people aren’t listening, and even fewer actually care. Nobody should be expected to listen or obligated to care. The world is busy. Who really wants to hear my problems? That’s what shrinks are for.

Family and friends, you say?…

Dear Love,

I’ll give you this. You dazzle me in movies, melt me in songs, and wow me in books. But how well do I really know you?

After all, these are the stories I want to hear. I will willingly watch, listen to, or read for hours. They say, “You’re based on a true story.” But I’ve never seen a beauty marry a beast or a street peasant marry a princess. Is it possible I like the idea of you more than I like you?…

There are so many moments in life.

But there is one moment that seems to captivate me far beyond any other. This moment is so rare that it moves about in flashes, every so often, and only if you’re lucky will you get to experience it throughout life. 

This moment wrestles my heart to the ground, squeezes it like a boa constrictor until it stops beating, like a mouse that stops breathing. But just for a moment. Suddenly, I feel a release. I’m alive again. In awe. Speechless. Not sure what to think, say, or do. All I’m left with is this moment, dancing there still in my mind…

I found you.

I don’t know what you are or who you are, but I know where you are. Because I found you.

A feeling that’s irreplaceable. Magic happens the moment I realize something is mine. Only mine. A feeling of possession. I claim you, care for you, and tell the world about you. It’s a dance between responsibility and vulnerability. A feeling so deep. So meaningful. All because I found you.

Sometimes this happens with a musician. Other times a lover. Or even a moment or a rock.

Does it even matter?…

Would it be okay if you never knew?

I say that seriously, too. There’s a thought I have of me undressing you. I slip my hand around your waist, there you are, finally looking at me differently than you ever have before. Would it be okay if you never knew?

Sometimes, I think about that thought before I go to sleep at night. Other times, as soon as I wake up. Like a bolt of lightning, it flashes in and out of my mind during any given day. For all of eternity, though, I will be the only one who knows. 

Our circumstances have led us here…